I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
It's just like the Real World with babies
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
