How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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