he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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