someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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