I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
