high people should be assigned attendants
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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