you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
