last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
im six kinds of drunk right now
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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