glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
