is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
