this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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