I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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