Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
