The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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