There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize