but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize