You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
40s are totally the cure
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
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