I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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