Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You dont lie about slip and slides
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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