Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
