have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm too high and old for this...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
