I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize