Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I supernannyed him into submission
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
