I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
my poor anus
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
