the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
