I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Randomize
