You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
