the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize