Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
