Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
