she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
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