i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize