So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
