David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
