The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
