Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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