just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a dog bed..
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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