i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
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The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
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ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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