she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize