just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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