she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
