yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
