So drunk its hurt
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
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There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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