i jhust puked up my retainher.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
