SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
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I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
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I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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