I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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