I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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