that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
