i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
