Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize