and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
